Conflict produces a significant amount of energy. The critical factor is how we use this energy: constructively, to create, or destructively, to destroy.
Poor conflict management reduces community performance as the users tend to focus all their energy on the conflict rather than using it to create something for themselves and the people around them. Conflicts cause stress, which can be so high that users might see only one way out — to leave the community.
The likelihood of destructive conflicts increases when users begin to avoid communication with one another. Make it your priority to maintain a community culture where users trust each other, are comfortable sharing their arguments openly, respect all other people involved in a discussion, listen to others and accept their opinions even if they disagree.
This is a fragment of a draft of the book “Lessons Learned While Working On Stack Overflow”. Read the full book on kindle or the paperback version.